In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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