"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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