i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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