susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
