i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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