Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
