Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I had to cum in my sink.
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