what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
