Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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