I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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