just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
