Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
