I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
i think my cat just said my name.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
