I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
