That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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