Just mADE A PArabola og urine
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
he fucked my hip out of place.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
