I feel like I'm in dance class right now
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
