y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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