I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize