I've blown a few things in my day
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Green mimosas i think yes
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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