do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
