Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize