do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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