I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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