Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
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Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
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When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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