i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
