"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
So much rum. So many feels.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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