do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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