Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
