why didn't you poke me back
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Randomize
