I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
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