There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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