i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
