I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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