Texts From Last Night

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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?

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  (832): it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right? http://tfl.nu/a8lp
  Replies (25) Good night (3858) Bad night (765)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"

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  (816): Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you" http://tfl.nu/hln2
  Replies (19) Good night (7186) Bad night (2228)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.

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  (321): No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds. http://tfl.nu/z7lt
  Replies (4) Good night (1033) Bad night (2154)
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  (310): View more from California

  I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues

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  (310): I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues http://tfl.nu/j2av
  Replies (4) Good night (1228) Bad night (782)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.

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  (910): He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that. http://tfl.nu/o050
  Replies (3) Good night (2929) Bad night (1229)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow

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  (412): Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow http://tfl.nu/f59o
  Replies (9) Good night (1125) Bad night (2069)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.

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  (814): I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before. http://tfl.nu/yjkb
  Replies (2) Good night (1192) Bad night (478)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.

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  (785): im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit. http://tfl.nu/en3h
  Replies (2) Good night (1478) Bad night (473)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.

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  (903): I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina. http://tfl.nu/287m
  Replies (2) Good night (1001) Bad night (419)
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  (323): View more from California

  All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again

  (424): View more from California

  I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill

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  (323): All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again (424): I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill http://tfl.nu/ys2w
  Replies (1) Good night (807) Bad night (586)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity

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  (313): Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity http://tfl.nu/jv85
  Replies (4) Good night (801) Bad night (486)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck

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  (513): she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck http://tfl.nu/n7bl
  Replies (4) Good night (1477) Bad night (408)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.

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  (773): I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose. http://tfl.nu/dyi2
  Replies (1) Good night (527) Bad night (309)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.

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  (301): You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person. http://tfl.nu/9uxg
  Replies (0) Good night (774) Bad night (241)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.

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  (630): Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes. http://tfl.nu/ckfv
  Replies (1) Good night (296) Bad night (154)

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