Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
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