His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
