His pubic hair was longer than his dick
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
