Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
