whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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