i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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