dude i'm inner monologue high
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
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