I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
