I love black thongs
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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