Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
