im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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