Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize