Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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