I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
