well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
